The greatest love story ever caught on film.

Sat, 02 Jun 2007 04:45:47 GMT

So work sucked tonight. I had a really nice Pomegranate Rockstar energy drink but after it was gone I felt like shaky and lightheaded and all that jazz. But that's not why I'm upset.
So at senior day today we got yearbooks and I hadn't gotten a chance to look at it much because I was swimming at Jayme's with the girls..so i take it to work so I can skim while I expo. I leave without it and freak out so I call work and tell the hostess to get it from the kitchen and put it in the office so nothing could happen to it. 30 minutes later I get a call from one of the cooks saying.."We found your yearbook under the counter..but we sprayed down the kitchen first so it's ruined..you can't even read the signatures". What makes it worse is my award for outstanding scholar that was signed by the President of the USA was in there also. All I wanted to do was make my dad proud for once in my life and now I can't. I lost all my friend's signatures and have to pay money for a new one so I pretty much lost money at work instead of making it. And on top of everything...I miss my brother bear and he hasn't even moved out yet...=(

prom is tomorrow.

Wed, 16 May 2007 02:56:35 GMT

I haven't updated in almost three months.
I think that's because I have nothing to say.

Car accident is almost paid off. Only $150 left.
Court in July for that...stupid bitch is going to jail.

Attended a wake Sunday.
First time I've ever seen a dead body.
I cried. My heart is with you and your
family Jose'..your sister will be dearly missed.

Other than that..
I want summer to be here NOW.

Fri, 23 Mar 2007 02:57:22 GMT

I had fun today/tonight.
I love Heather baby.
Brittany and Angelica are funnnn!
I have a migraine but will be soundly sleeping soon.
I like alliteration.

I keep reminding myself every morning that without suffering there would be no compassion in the world...remember it.

Fri, 16 Mar 2007 00:40:58 GMT

Graduation is 3 months away. Thank God.
Prom is June 2nd.
So excited for both.
School is good, I guess.
I can only miss like 2 more days though. :-/
I got a senior superlative. "Life of the Party" hahah.
I love my boyfriend. I love my cat.
Brother Bear is moving out soon....ugh.
ODU in the fall.
DC on Saturday with baby to see Explosions in the Sky.
I'm swell. How are you?

Tue, 27 Feb 2007 02:22:05 GMT

So I told my mom tonight more than I probably should have. I know it will come back to bite me but I am making the attempt to get close with her so I can have a semi-decent relationship with one of my parental units. Trust is definitely a missing link so I thought I'd be honest for a change. She now knows that I am "sexually active", smoke cigarettes and have two tattoos. All of which she should've known by now, of course. Me and my baby's two years and 4 months is very close ..I mean come on. I leave ashes all over the car along with lighters, empty packs and butts in the tray ...hello? I just got my other tattoo but it's on my foot..how hard is that to find? Anyways she promised to keep all of this from my dad..which is what I'm praying she'll do because if most or all of that gets out..I'll need a place to stay until I move in which Zach. hahah. Wow. At least I can smoke outside with my mom now when my dad's not around. The perks of being an adult.

Fri, 09 Feb 2007 02:56:53 GMT

My mom is still in the hospital. It seems like the only time we get along is when she is really sick. Once I get my nursing degree, I could take care of her. I've been in a really morbid state of mind the past few days, I guess it's from watching "A Walk to Remember" and my mom being hospitalized.

On a more positive note, my best friend will be back from JMU tomorrow and fun times shall be had by all. She is me in another body, I swear. I am so excited to have my "best" back.

Zach and I are going to look at the pet store tomorrow for puppies! Then he's going to Richmond and I'm going to Bayside General to pay my mom a visit. Then I have work like always. I hate work. sdlkfjkgj. The anticipation of crunk time always makes it go by faster though.

Ps- I found a dress for prom today,a really nice 400 dollar dress. I would like to add that I am claiming the sole right to wear yellow to prom. I am going to look like Belle from my favorite Disney movie, "Beauty and the Beast". My boyfriend is growing a beard to make it fit appropriately (kiddddding..I think). Anyone else who wears yellow is hella lame and a jocker. =]

Wed, 17 Jan 2007 00:44:16 GMT

So midterms are next week and I am a mess. The reviews are all insanely long..in addition to the paper I already am behind on for English 212. That paper is actually due by 9 AM tomorrow morning and I have yet to start on it. I have 5 A's and a B so I don't know why I am stressing so much..probably just the pressure to keep the grades up. But why? Whenever I get stressed about my grades I just remind myself that I don't get the chance to apply to any colleges. I am going less than five minutes away due to lack of funding. sigh. Oh well, what can you do. I suppose I will continue to juggle my babysitting and working with my school work and boyfriend even though there is no reward in sight for doing so. At least graduation is in less than 5 months. Prom is in less than 4. Spring break with the boyfriend to South Carolina? Going to DC with the boyfriend in March. Valentine's in less than a month. There is still some things to be excited about.

Tue, 09 Jan 2007 00:52:16 GMT

I feel I must write for the mere fact I haven't written in quite some time. School is still school..onward progress I suppose. Just about half a year left and then I move on to bigger and better things. Things like helping people. :] I can't wait to be a nurse. or a wife. or a mom. I swear I am a decade ahead of myself. In the mean time, slavestressing is my occupation until someone finds me a job with wicked good pay. I've had the flu since Wednesday and am glad I am definitely better. On the other hand, I have a wisdom tooth growing in..so I guess I will be in pain eternally. One thing I have realized with all this extra time on my hands..being sick and all..friends are fallible. I don't want to rely on people who can be so flaky. I guess that's what my problem was..dependence. So my "friends" reading this..which I know a number of do..I would love to hear from you and, more so, hang out with you. You have my number..the telecommunication will be a one way path from here on out, you know how to reach me. Lindsay, who is more of a sister than a friend..is coming down from JMU friday so we can go to the saosin/sensesfail/alexisonfire show..i wouldn't mind missing it..but what are friends for? I am glad I have a best friend who I also "get physical" with. haha without my boyfriend..I'd probably kill myself because he's pretty much the only friend to call me not only to hang out, but also just to talk. Despite the somber subject matter of this entry..I am glad to say I am in a great mood. Hope everyone had a great New Years!!!!

Mon, 11 Dec 2006 01:57:22 GMT

My boyfriend caused me to have a major panic attack last night when he kept knocking on my window, waking me from a DEEP sleep caused by working like a zombie after a night of no sleep. I was unaware of exactly what was happening and was confused about what time it was, where I was and why I was on the phone without remembering answering it. I definitely flipped out for the first time in a while, shaking and crying.. but regained composure quickly. I've gotten better with my anxiety but it's still there. I've also gotten better with my insecurity, I can look in a mirror and not be completely happy..but at least not unhappy. December is going by so fast and I have no complaints. I want it to be Christmas so we can see the lights at the beach, open our presents by the tree, walk in town center while it's snowing, get starbucks and then cuddle by the fireplace. Christmas is killing me, I've saved up 400 dollars so far and have every intention of spending it all. I like shopping online. :) digjsdifjgndfgjidsjg. I haven't updated this in forever, excuse the rambling.

Sun, 19 Nov 2006 04:50:41 GMT

Birthday was funnn. Partied Friday night. Boyfriend for over 13 hours today/tonight. Movies, dinner, abercrombie presentsss.. etc etc. I'm so glad Nate, Joe, Anthony, Ryan, George and Brandon are either all back or about to be all back. Nate came to my birthday dinner. I miss soccer season of last year. I miss last year. I miss LINDSAY ORTIZ who is basically my sister. She will be back TUESDAY and we are going to the clubs haha. I love life. I got a 3.5 on report cards. I'm starting as a server tomorrow at work. Still very much in love for forever. Life is good and I'm soaking it all up. 18..woop woop.

Wed, 01 Nov 2006 19:06:23 GMT

leigh ann. emilee. jayme. heatherrr. JZ.
I can count my favorite girls on one hand and I love it.
and the party crew would be minus leigh ann, add nicole<3. hahah
I love the weekends. I love getting down with my girls after a long week. I don't love my job but who does? I need more money. oh wellll.
My dad just bought a 2300 dollar hd tv and my brother bought a 800 dollar one, which moves the old big screen into the 2nd living room and my brothers old tv into my roooom. yayyy. my old one was super small. I feel like talking about pointless things because I am bored and waiting for my boo to scoop me up so we can go eat and cuddle and such. School is getting on my nerves, It's a lot of work. Well, especially for Dual Enrollment..AP Psych gets hectic too. I hope I pull off the 4 A's and 2 B's that I'm aiming for.
Me and the boyfren's two YEARS is Fridayyyyyy. hollah.
K bye.

Wed, 18 Oct 2006 01:36:24 GMT

If you dissected my stomach at this very moment, all you would see amongst my bloody entrails would be a bright, eye-pleasing array of orange, yellow and white. I am trying this new diet where I only eat candy corn. I do this all day, every day until halloween. Of course, I try to integrate an unhealthy dose of Coldstone ice cream into the diet as well. My taste buds are quite satisfied, my stomach however is a bit upset. Halloween is fun because I get to dress up like a kitty cat again! I do believe I was a cat in my former life, or will be one in a future life. I never know how to wrap up these entries so instead of digressing, I bid you goodnight.

Tue, 03 Oct 2006 23:58:03 GMT

I am already tired of school. I've missed 4 days of the same class. I get two more times until the end of January. A waiver is in my near future. I am already suffering from an extreme case of Senioritis. I feel the need to get out of high school as soon as humanly possible. I am 43rd in a class of 500 so I have done well with my time spent here. I am much too lazy to apply for any scholarships so I am going to take out huge student loans so I can avoid going to TCC. The more I look at the University of Tennessee the more I realize it would be wonderful for me, I miss the state so much. JMU would be a blast, everyone seems to love it. But I have way too much to leave behind. So if all goes as planned, next fall I will be walking with boyfriend through the ODU campus, sipping coffee and sharing donuts. Repeat for 3 more years. At this time I will move in with him into our nice apartment with our puppy and live happily ever after. Not too improbable at all.
PS- happy 23 months baby. I love you.

Thu, 14 Sep 2006 01:55:27 GMT

Because it's the cool thing to do..

Wed, 06 Sep 2006 21:40:07 GMT

I guess I am the only one on earth who thinks it's sad rather than "tough" or "funny" that Steve Irwin died. It is especially sad since he died in the process of making a childrens' documentary for his daughter. You all are heartless.

Sun, 13 Aug 2006 06:57:54 GMT

Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night terrified of life. Sometimes.

Wed, 12 Jul 2006 12:39:54 GMT

Besty and I decided approximately at the 5 o' clock hour to just fore-go sleeping and pull an all-nighter. We then proceeded to steal MY car, of which i am not permitted to drive (except on the near everyday occasion I must transport myself to work), to go to Starbucks/McDonald's for our first, and only, meal of the day. I am going to get ready for work and then stop at Target and then go to work. Then Besty, Danielle and I are exposing our skin to ultraviolet rays in efforts of increasing our melatonin. Afterwards, I'm going to sleep for the rest of my life. Well, maybe just until Circa Survive tomorrow! Please excuse the abnormally long message. Self-induced sleep deprivation tends to dull my sense of rationalization.

Fri, 07 Jul 2006 05:20:01 GMT

I came terribly close to fighting some girl in the bowling alley tonight.
It was exhilarating. I contained myself because I didn't want to get baby and I kicked out when he was bowling such a great game. It was funny though.

Tue, 04 Jul 2006 05:58:50 GMT

So a couple hours ago was me and my baby's 20th month together. After the past few turbulent weeks, it is so great to be back on track and making progress again. We are back to growing together instead of growing apart. In the span of a year and 8 months there is bound to be some hard times, some bumps in the road, but we manage to get past them. We have to because what we have is much more than what most can only dream of. It's special and if we have to work at it every single day then that's what we'll do because what we share is too good to let go of. I wish I could be watching the fireworks tonight with baby, yet I am working 10:30 am to 11 pm. Of course I have to close and clean everyone's mess so I will be home sometime after midnight. I have sold my soul to Ruby Tuesday. Yikes. Goodnight all, I must be up in about 7 hours.

Wed, 28 Jun 2006 06:50:44 GMT

I can't breathe. I just had one of the worst panic attacks I've ever had. Now I can't sleep because my medicine makes me sick to my stomach. And I have to be at work at 10.

Maybe it's time to re-evaluate some things. A lot of things. You can take this unset amount of time to do just that. I'll be here when I'm ready.

Mon, 26 Jun 2006 04:48:34 GMT

My little feetsies hurt from standing/walking/etc 7.5 hours straight at work tonight.
Bought my Circa Survive ticket today. yayayay. Nothing much to say except I love baby, tarah, laying out, fooooood, money and online games.

Thu, 22 Jun 2006 04:57:37 GMT

Hanging out with Tarah on an almost daily basis again like old times.
Swimming in my pool and dancing and playing online games with her.
Walking to 7-11. Singing in grocery stores. Driving around. Double dates.
I've missed her. This is good. :D

Working at Ruby Tuesdays.
Working hard, making money.
Tiring, but I have more
money to spend on me and
baby now. Let's get massages.

I find myself more and more in love
with my boyfriend everyday. It amazes
me because you'd think we would've hit
some type of climax by now, but each day
is just better and better. I am going to
marry this boy. We already talk of the weather
and gas prices and what's in the newspaper :).
yayayaya. Hanging out every single day for multiple
hours and I never grow tired of time spent with him.
Never. I am so extremely lucky. He even loves me when
I look gross after work and even when I push him off
the bed and even when I am a mean baby. yeeeeeeeee!

Wed, 14 Jun 2006 14:26:51 GMT

so my junior year of high school is over and I couldn't be more ecstatic. I hated this year with a passion. Worst year of high school thus far. Well, emotionally speaking..9th grade was the worst. This year my classes just sucked. Hopefully senior year will be better, I know it will. I'll be missing my other half meeting me and kissing me between classes though. I will have to walk all by my lonesome to class. I'm a big girl though so I should do fine. I hate being 17. I wish I was 27 instead. I'm tired of high school and rules and family. I want my own apartment while I attend nursing school so I can do what I want, when I want. Going to graduation Sunday to watch my baby graduate with honors. I am going to cry my eyes out. I am so proud of him. I applied at Texas Steakhouse and Ruby Tuesdays so far. Thinking about applying at AMC. I don't really care where I work as long as I'm making money. I love my car even though I don't think it's cute. I won't be complaining about gas because the only place I can drive is to work , once I get a job. I have a 3.3 this quarter yet I am grounded because of my grades...hmm. Oh yeah, I am also a financial burden on my family so the annual summer trip to South Carolina is most likely off, all thanks to me. COOL.

Sun, 11 Jun 2006 04:35:06 GMT

Me and boyfren played N64 for a great deal of time tonight. Pokemon Stadium and Mario Party 2 (don't act like those aren't the jam). I, of course, the elite video game player I am, beat him in both. He will always be better at Space Invaders though, no doubt. He tries to distract me with kisses and tickles and things of that nature, (CHEATER!) It's so much fun..we act like we're little kids all the time, I love it. Then we had a very nice dinner and layed in bed watching Comedy Central. We turned the lights out and looked up at the ceiling and at the glow in the dark stars placed on it. We cuddled and held hands and talked about the future. Our future. We lightly slept and rustled about and dreaded the fact that he would soon have to take me home. We talked of the day when he won't have to take me home, because I'll already be there.

Wed, 07 Jun 2006 19:22:37 GMT

You're the reason I believe in silly things such as love, trust & happiness. You're the reason I believe in forever. And those things don't seem so silly anymore. They seem real.